Children are troublesome. If we take spirituality out of the equation, children become sources of unnecessary life problems.
The reason is obvious.
If we were merely physical beings, then children are just arrangements of organic molecules who cry loudly, poop randomly and — even when behaving well — cost a lot of money.
Our desire to have them is simply DNA’s default setting. It is our genes’ godless trick to propagate themselves as we ride the stream of Darwinian evolution.
This partially explains why, as people move away from religion, it becomes more rational to not want kids. We can even use science to argue for it1For example, ‘7 Reasons People Shouldn’t Have Children, According to Science’ lists factors such as global warming and evidence of reduced income.
More than the material
On the other hand, our non-materialistic self recognises children as more than just physical beings.
Even if you are not that religious, there are moments when your fiṭrah captures the unspoken messages borne by children2Fiṭrah means primordial nature, the way something is originally created. When not covered by corruptions, our fiṭrah is inclined towards the Truth (The Byzantines, 30:30). Watch this insightful lecture: Primordial Nature of Human Beings..
Some messages may be painful but necessary.
For example, children chip away at your egoistic attachment to desires. When you are responsible for a child, your wants come second to their needs.
That is annoying.
Even when you outsource their care, children are still draining your resources.
It slows your career progress, making it harder (if not outright impossible) to have fun, be rich and become famous— all the stuff your ego desired since you were younger.
Yet, that trial is precisely the spiritual nourishment you need.
It reminds you that your desires are not meant to take the throne, and that you should continuously reassess what you are pursuing in life.
Children bring lessons that we miss
Ultimately, to purify your soul, you must detach your ego from the illusions brought about by worldly desires, and submit your ego to Him.
However, at certain stages of our path, that complete detachment is too difficult.
So, He teaches us to give up our self-centredness bit by bit; one way is through those adorable yet needy, tiny humans.
Other messages are right in front of our nose that we often miss.
For example, children can extract more joy from one moment than we do from one whole day. They remind us that how long you live is less valuable than how much you live. While adults often want expensive things and grand events to enjoy life, children capture the small sparks of joy as those moments flare and fade forever.
Next time you meet those little beings, reflect on the spiritual messages you learn from them.
As troublesome as children are, they are not the most terrible things to have3Familial relationships are scientifically your best investment for happiness. See Happiness: What We Learn from a 75-year Harvard Study..
Notes:
- 1For example, ‘7 Reasons People Shouldn’t Have Children, According to Science’ lists factors such as global warming and evidence of reduced income
- 2Fiṭrah means primordial nature, the way something is originally created. When not covered by corruptions, our fiṭrah is inclined towards the Truth (The Byzantines, 30:30). Watch this insightful lecture: Primordial Nature of Human Beings.
- 3Familial relationships are scientifically your best investment for happiness. See Happiness: What We Learn from a 75-year Harvard Study.