Failure can be a gift. And I don’t mean it in a motivational, positive thinking sense.
Right now, you have given your best and made sacrifices. You aren’t lazy; you’ve put in the time, effort, and dedication.
Yet, you failed.
This failure is a gift because it reveals what you’re not willing to give up, just to get what others see as success.
Imagine you are pursuing the goal of becoming a chess grandmaster. It requires thousands of hours of practice and analysis. You need to sacrifice time with family and other aspects of your life that are important.
If you still fail to even get close to being a grandmaster, you have two options:
You can either push harder, sacrifice more, and reflect on your methods.
Or you ask yourself, ‘Is this pursuit truly worth it? What else am I willing to give up? What will I miss out on if I continue down this path?’
Practical steps when facing failures
I give chess as an example for a reason: Most of us do not have an emotional attachment to it.
For most of you, if you don’t become a chess grandmaster, you won’t disappoint your mother. Your friends or colleagues are not looking down on you. People don’t care.
So you have that cognitive distance. You can appreciate failure for its resetting function.
But how about your current job or study?
If you’ve been failing, consider these practical steps:
- Reflect on Your Goals: Take time to honestly assess what you truly want to achieve. Are these goals aligned with your deepest values ?
- Evaluate Sacrifices: Identify what you have sacrificed so far and what further sacrifices will be necessary . Determine if these are sustainable or worthwhile.1Don’t give up what is worth more to you than the goal you are pursuing. See Your Life Story: Learning from the ‘Unsuccessful’ in Life
- Seek Logical Feedback: Talk to lecturers, mentors, or performance coaches who are not emotionally invested in your current pursuit. Gain that external perspective.
- Adjust Your Strategy: If you decide to continue, consider changing your routine. Learn new methods, acquire additional skills, or adjust your timelines.
- Explore Alternatives: If your current pursuit is not fulfilling, research alternative career paths or studies that align better with your deep interests and life goals.2See Careershifters. (n.d.). How to change career when you’ve no idea what to do next. Careershifters. Retrieved June 29, 2024, from https://www.careershifters.org/expert-advice/how-to-change-career-when-youve-no-idea-what-to-do-next
Failures, especially painful ones, bring clarity to these paths.
That’s why failure is a gift.
Notes:
- 1Don’t give up what is worth more to you than the goal you are pursuing. See Your Life Story: Learning from the ‘Unsuccessful’ in Life
- 2See Careershifters. (n.d.). How to change career when you’ve no idea what to do next. Careershifters. Retrieved June 29, 2024, from https://www.careershifters.org/expert-advice/how-to-change-career-when-youve-no-idea-what-to-do-next